the beauty of commenting :D


total: 112 comments :D

it's not much but now you see why i deleted my cbox. at least your footprints are more permanent here :) thanks to kwanyi, sam, mj, jess, afiq, rishi, ruby, kai, dq, simon, bryan, etc :)

oh i came up with a lame joke.

what does emogirl say when she had a happy day? highlight>> this is not my day. ahahha lame right! i came up with another just before i slept. when two and three fight, who's the winner?

highlight>> "no one".

ahahhaha sorry i just wasted few minutes of your life :p contract law exam this friday -uh oh. people are seldom "bound by honour" nowadays. everything must be in black and white.

i blame the excessive "betrayal movies" out there.

i came up with a new paper game!

it's called "save the man". you need at least two players. one killer and one saviour. the killer draws objects to kill the man and the saviour does otherwise. there are basically no rules.

i played with navin yesterday.

i used cars, drill wagons, lightning, goku's evil twin, evil yong sui money-minded cina man, etc. navin used ultraman, dog poison, super dimensional something, etc. it was a tough battle. i like this the best:

navin was the killer.

aegis is an item in dota :p it helps a hero to respawn without actually losing his life. after that navin wanted to sniper-kan me with a manga professional assassin. i asked whether i could matrix again and navin answered:

"if you want to break your back again."

yes, i am aware that my blog is dull. but the good thing about being dull is that it loads faster -yes i'm an impatient person. i once wanted to put up those "hug counters" except i'd edit it into give joanne a slap.

for people who despise me.

hey, i'd give myself a slap or two too. i once wanted to insert a link at the end of every post which will direct readers to the post on the exact date one year ago (yes, i figured out it's boring).

and then there are polls.

polls are fun. sort of. though they are sort of mundane. if not asking about how to improve the blog (should i put more pictures etc), it'll probably be about teasing a friend (mark tawau and tan sli).

people should be more daring.

like. would you want joanne as your girlfriend and why?

1 yes lah! it's joanne man!

2 yes because she is so pretty and cute :D

3 no, joanne's anti-social

4 no, she's too boring

5 no, she's cheap and sleezy

please dont vote. i have three articles to write and an exam next friday. i disgust myself. just a day, just an ordinary day, just trying to get on by.

bye.

he came from a poor family.

they planted paddy and vegetables and reared pigs. he left home for high school and obtained a scholarship for college, graduated, and worked a few years to pay for his university education in UK.

one day, i asked him:

"baba, what are you most afraid of?"

"what am i afriad of..." he sighed and looked into a distant. he smiled and shook his head, simultaneously directing his sight back to the newspaper, "thankfully the day hasnt came yet".

i checked the online bulletin. some clubs are just so happening.

Tourism Club is organizing a trip to Pulau Redang.

i though, hm, that should be fun.

and then i scrolled down.

Law Society is organizing a trip to Sungai Buloh Prison.

Oh.

oh, another confession: i cut my hair. literally.

out of curiosity.

why would you want to die without ever cutting your own hair? but it's tiring i tell you. i cut half and then fell asleep on the floor with a pile of hair beside. i woke up two hours later and got back to work.

it took me 3 days.

-

and i miss the city. i wonder where would i be now if i didnt refuse to go to ktar to do a-level in january. at least i'd still have josh. high schoolmates are going oversea, high schoolmates are dating. oh so sweet.

and here i am. wondering.

oh. i decided to be simple.

confession 101: i emptied my trash bin in front of my neighbor's doorstep because i was mad at them.

confession 101: forgive me father for i have sinned.

-eh, why so serious?

since i'm in a happy mood today, i shall tell you something i did in the past year which i will probably never do again. something about rubbish.

confession

i'm currently staying in an apartment. last year, there was a bunch of international students staying right above my unit - and i'm not discriminating IS but the truth prevails here in my blog wtf - and they were the most inconsiderate people on earth.

or at least, we were 99% sure they were.

you know why arh. the pantry area is right beside the entrance and there are windows behind the basin. so these people, they loved, loved, loved to throw things out the window.

that's okay if it didnt concern me but the gifts landed RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY DOORSTEP! if not on the pathway in front of my unit. it was gross and annoying, not to mention disgusting and at times smelly.

they really knew how to piss me off.

the variety was overwhelming man i tell you. mystery gifts have never been this surprising. rice and gravy today, egg shells tomorrow, pieces of maggi noodles the next. horrible right!

sometimes packets, wrappers, and some slimey unidentified brown liquid.

and then the ants came, the insects came, the mak cik cleaner came. and you know lah, it's damn unfiar because the cleaners will hate us padahal it wasnt our problem at all. and then one day when i came back from campus, there was something on the floor...

hi there. i'm an unfinished curry chicken. nice to meet you.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. that was the last straw. thankfully, my housemates back then were lazy people who refuse to take out the garbage (justified by numerous blog entries posted last year), the garbage bin was full.

i've never been so happy because of an "overflowing" dustbin.

i gladly put the chicken into the dustbin, took the dustbin, climbed up the stairs and gleefully poured the rubbish all over the front of their doorstep. and then ran to my unit for the life of me afraid i'd get caught.

because you know why.

the apartment i stay in is much like a prison. there are cctv's everywhere. in all 6 lifts and a pair in all 36 floors (though i heard some were not in used). so being the lousy psycho i was, i went to change into new clothes and left a note for my housemates not to answer the the management if they called to enquire about crazy-garbage-girl.

and then from my room i heard the screams above.

that was a moment of intense satisfaction wtf. after that the gifts from above reduced, and eventually there were none. i think they shifted away anyway because there's no more late night boombox. so that's my confession lah.

i didnt tell anyone except my housemates.

and then life went on as usual and i guess it was all worth it. i could have called the apartment management to complain about unwanted flying objects (eh ufo also) but there was a sudden irresistable impulse deriving from extreme anger (excuses, excuses).

so that's all lah for my confession today. imma go pee. bye.

6. Yet can it be that the present Government is so stupid and unimaginative as to use the same "ploy", especially after it was so happy over the release of Anwar? Surely it could come up with another story which would be more credible if it is deliberately plotting or conspiring against Anwar. The probability is that the story is the same because it is genuine.

quoted from chedet. pertaining to anwar's sodomy accusation.

i considered that too. but then again, we can say that that itself is the government's "ploy". making the same accusation to make us think the government is stupid and then wishing we'd come to realization that, hey, you know what, where got government so stupid wan and think the accusation is genuine.

it's like playing guess which hand's holding the eraser.

when you're 8 years old, and your mum held it in her left hand three times, you'd think the fourth time it'll be in the left too. wrong. mum knew you would pick left.

when you're 12 years old (now smarter abit already), you know your mum did the first three times the same intentionally to con you, so you pick the right hand. wrong. your mum knew you're smart enough.

when you're 18 years old (now holy sht smart already), you become even smarter. you know that your mother knows that you know that she wants to con you. so you pick the left hand. correct, your mother is one step behind - just like dr m's words.

catch my drift?

(whoever is paranoid enough to go to level 4 - i know you know i know you know i know you want to con me - needs to see a psychiatrist) that's all for today. tangkiu.

the chronicles of jpa jpb part 1

he said i'm boring. i knew that wtf.

want to know why i never blogged about politics? because i feel that i can never know everything. and i know very little. i'll never get the whole picture and i can almost guarantee you that none of us can because our government is not transparent and what people do about it?

they blog. they blog and criticize.

what's so great about criticising the government when it's not constructive at all? i mean, i can totally understand if you suggest that the government should do this and that but what the eff is wrong with these people who keep criticising the government and do nothing?

please shut up and go dig a hole.

no, i'm not pointing fingers at anyone. you really want to know what i think? you really. want. to. know? fine i'll tell you what i think. wait. am i starting to bore you (if i havent bore you already)? oh eff i am.

the chronicles of jpb

anyway, it's like having john, paul and bob sharing toys you know, let's say playing barbie doll lah, except they're supposed to be separate entities because "absolute power corrupts absolutely" - you know lah, one boy takes all the barbie and thinks he's casanova padahal the barbies hate him.

however, they were not separate. why?

john is paul's brother so they're from the same mother. they had no choice because it's their father's fault ma hor, must respect the father's decision to impregnant the mother - what to do hor, he's the founder of john and paul wor.

and then there's bob.

bob is this adopted child, who is treated by the parents like their own son. except things change when they went away. because you know lah this john guy is so dictatorial he threatened bob and say i know i took your barbie's dress but I AM CORRECT! - and bob agrees.

because you know why - long story lah ok.

john, paul and bob were supposed to enjoy the same powers but to make sure no one bullies no one, the mother asked bob to look out for paul; paul to look out for john; and john to look out for bob. but you know what this john do arh!

this john said woi, i'm powerful so i control everything lah.

when bob said no, john said you cant do anything man, i got more supporter. which is kinda true lah because john got paul and bob got no one. paul couldnt help bob because john has a whip and john said he'll whip paul's barbie doll if paul backs bob up. so john provides bob's bread and butter.

and apparently allowance too wtf.

john: if you good boy i give you more allowance
bob: wtf.
john: what wtf i'm serious wtf.

am i boring or what wtf.

so slowly, slowly, they became a joint force. even bob had to go with the flow even though he's immuned from the whip (which can only be used on biological brothers -poor paul), like it or not. so in the end they exploit all of the barbie dolls and live like the sissies they are. the end.

that's all for chapter 1. bye.

my sister - jess - trying to be funny in langkawi.

10.12am this morning.

joanne: i want to go back to sleep you know. but stomach like kong kong.
jessica: stomach like GRANDFATHER?!!
joanne: AHAHHA NO LARH! KONG KONG
jessica: THUNDER?!!
joanne: AHAHHAHA BLANK BLANK LA!
jessica: OH BLANK!

my stomach was empty. so was jess' head. ahahhaha. :x

i'm so amazed by mmu's wireless. this morning at 9am plus, i managed to download a normal 3-4mb song in 2 minutes. the speed was 48kb/s instead of the usual 4.8kb/s i get in the afternoons.

what IT service fee?

okay . i wont say i'm completely 100% against the IT service fee they intend to impose. though RM100 is still not justified, especially when we're not getting what cyber is.

please go sign the petition. tangkiu.

amirul suggested that tm is imposing all kinds of fees to pay of their debts before selling mmu. if it's true i wonder where all our money went. so mmu isnt a money-making-university anymore?

jess wants a laptop.

(jess always wants something. she wants a laptop and a wii and a plasma tv and SAT books and starbucks. seriously man, this girl wants too much, any rich guy wants my sister?)

being a nice sister, i sms-ed her during IT fair.

joanne: specs please.

jess: T5760, 1.83GHz, processor 1.8, 15 inch, webcam, 3GB ram, 160GB hdd, nvidia geforce 8400M GS128mb or 8600M GT 256mb

joanne: this one very cheap! free bag somemore!
jess: bag always come free wan lar. if someone wanna charge you for bag you whack him on the head with the bag.

joanne: acer 2gb, 160hdd! but use vista wor, no xp...
jess: nowadays all also vista one lar. only you kuno orang looking for xp.

joanne: oo. this one satellite. acer i think. 1gb ram, but 120 hdd wor
jess: eh why ram only 1gb. what are you looking at man.

joanne: this one cheap cheap hehe. 256ram, 80 hdd.
jess: stupid what are you looking at again??? why the ram keep getting smaller?!

joanne: cheap ma! only 1499! got free bag, cooler pad, and security lock somemore!
jess: cheap your head, whack your stupid head with the free stuff. get at least 2gb ram plus graphic card only talk to me!

joanne: actually this is pre launch only hehe. so only got a few laptop.
jess: ARGH!!! THEN WHY ARE YOU THERE???

joanne: hehe. actually satellite is toshiba.
jess: yes. when you told me satellite i already know it's toshiba. only you sendiri think it's acer.

joanne: oh ahaha. you know actually i'm getting grant for laptop.
jess: HOW MUCH?

joanne: what how much?
jess: THE GRANT!!!

joanne: oh! ahahha sorry i forgot what we're talking about. it's a secret ;)
jess: AHHHHHHHHHHH!! THIS GIRL IS TOO STUPID!!!!!

is my sister hard to please or what!

smile like you mean it. 这个世界唯一的你是我拥有的奇迹

one year, i told myself, just pull through this one year. even at the very moment i feel like walking away, i told myself it's okay, one year and i'm done, one year and that's it, i wont join this anymore. one year for a scholarship.

i hate sacrifices.

it's everytime you have to turn down a friend to go for movies because you need to catch up with your studies (and then you eventually see them hanging out and laughing without you); it's everytime you have to excuse yourself from dinner early to catch a meeting;

it's everytime you pick up a phone call (even when you save the number as do not pickup) because you have to although something bad always entails it; it's running around campus getting letters signed and delivered; it's not having proper meals and attending to last minute tasks.

and most of all, it's everytime you realize it's the weekend but you cant go home to see that special someone because something is always on. fund-raising, ticket-selling, exhibition, drama, cultural night, fair, exams, etc. it's everytime you disappoint that someone and hence yourself.

it's every. single. bloody. time.

but it all paid off. to a certain extent i'd say i deserve to be where i am. i've never push myself this hard before. to hell with a certain extent - i deserve to be where i am. why be humble when i'm not that great :p it's all over. i wanted this. i wanted this so much i seemed over my head. i'm thrilled to be where i am. i'm happy. i'm contented. i'm satisfied. this is where i want to be.

so why do i feel like this.

tm plans to sell mmu! :o

amirul came up with this brilliant plan: all mmu students should use our ptptn money to buy mmu. so we'll have free education plus we are the bosses of rude staff from now on. now we can really apply what we learn in class: i dont like your face, get out of my property. hell yea, that would be fun.

want to create history?

i somehow believe that dreams mean something. there used to be a section in star two where people sent in mails about their dreams and someone interprets them. like madam zara and handwriting.

i concluded that i dream of things which i fear and things which i want. i dreamt that some other girl stole away my ex-boyfriend about five times - yea, i always woke up feeling like -.

but of course i dream of things which i desire too - which is ironic - but somehow i'll always know whether i wanted it or not because i feel what i feel in my dreams.

and i've also dreamt of weird stories which included unknown faces i designed. and i dreamt of jay chou. the dream wasnt exactly melancholy but it left me a feeling somewhat alike.

i had a dream. by joanne loke.

i was at home. jay chou rushed into the house holding on to a fish bowl with a big fish and about four smaller fishes inside. he held my hand tightly and told me desperately "help! the fishes are dying!"




like an innocent child.




it broke my heart to see him so frustrated. looked at the fish bowl. the water is filled up to about 30%. "how about you fill in more water?" i asked. he shook his head and frowned, "it's no use".




he walked out the door. he left.




i googled for the species of the fishes. the fishes feed on the juicy pearl-looking center of a rare yellow flower. i went out to the wilds in search of the flower. i found one. i brought it back home. i dropped it into the fish bowl.




the fishes swarmed to feed on the flower.




i was overjoyed. i smiled. i watched the fishes. i must tell jay chou about this! i stood up and held the fish bowl close to my stomach. i decided to find more flowers and show the fishes to jay chou.




he'll be so happy!




when i opened the door, i was elsewhere. jay chou was busy with work with many others, directing a music video or something. he didnt seem to notice me at all. no one did. jay chou didnt care about the fishes anymore.



-

care to interpret this?

pms. stay away. stay far away.




think you have common sense?
nah. a poem for you to complete.

i have __ apple, and you have __.
you give me __ apple, and i have __.
i eat __ apple, and give __ back to you.
i dont have any apple, you still have __.

oh, and i dreamt of jay chou.

i'll tell you about it next post. sam read it :D you must read! i command you to! also, i've put the cbox up again after more than 5 months and several requests.

long live lazy people!

you guys know that you can actually comment as "anonymous" or any nickname you want (yes, including pak lah, superman, etc) right? oh well. till then. taa ;)

there's something about the love for an inanimate object. the love for a pillow for example (as in the case of my sister who calls her pillow her "best friend"), or the love for fishballs in my case.

it feels nice because that object cant hurt you.

lately i figured it is analogous to the love for a person who doesnt know you, in fact better if he doesnt acknowledge your existence at all, because that sort of gives you an excuse to not dislike him.

he's jay chou in my case.


jay chou sleeping - so adorable! :D i love.

which reminds me, i read an article yesterday about jay chou. jay chou wants a girlfriend who's compatible with his mum, likes listening to his music and watches him play basketball.

his mum also added that she should not be a superstar.

:D

joanne whines.

i'm back in kota kemuning!

note (to understand my whiny-whiny): to get home, i need to take a bus to malacca central, a bus to pudu, a train to hang tuah, a train to kl central, a train to subang jaya, and a car back home.

process: 4.5 hours.

i'm damn angry at the kkkl bus corporation again! today, i got to malacca central and lined up for my ticket while that old chinese man barked "kuala lumpur satu setengah!" repeatedly.

i raised my hand politely "kuala lumpur satu?"

i was asking whether there was a ticket at 1pm but he interpreted it as an intention to purchase. he handed me a ticket. i stared at it. i asked, "pukul satu tak ada?" "tak ada lah!! cepat! cepat!"

that's fine.

he shoved the ticket to me. i paid. i boarded the bus half an hour later. ohhh, fuck. it's that driver again. i dont feel bad saying it because after all he is a fat, old, rude, fucking racist, malay driver.

THE, fat old rude fucking racist malay driver.

sorry i have to use the word malay - because he's racist. the last time i took kkkl back home end of may, he was driving the bus too. and he made me hate the whole bus corporation.

way to go, fat boy.

that day, a malay woman asked him whether he would drop her by the road and he kindly said yes. he opened the door and asked her "awas motor ya!" subsequently a few asked too and he obliged.

hey, i want to get off early too, to skip a train.

so i approached and asked him, "boleh tak berhenti kat hang tuah?" politely. see, the bus passes by hang tuah. he hesitated, tsked, and said "TAK BOLEH TAK BOLEH! SITU TAK ADA LAMPU TRAFIK!"

i went back to my seat, sulking.

so much for the hassle - because i was sitting between a luggage-full girl and the window. when the bus reached hang tuah, the driver yelled "AHHH! CEPAT KELUAR CEPAT KELUAR!"

a few fidgeted off their seats. i wasnt alone.

it was a sudden "command". i gathered my belongings and stood up. the girl didnt budge. i stepped over her and i fell. three parts stupidity, one part luck. it was effing painful okay! my pelvis bone hurt for days :(

i got up and got off after saying thanks.

so today i took the bus again, because to me, it's more comfortable than transnational and i dont trust the others. this time, a malay girl around my age went up to ask to get off early somewhere.

and it was all chitty-chatty and nice.

and then some chinese girl asked whether she could get off. he hesitated. she went back to her seat. at a traffic light, he yelled "AHH! SIAPA YANG NAK KELUAR, KELUAR SEKARANG!"

about four or five of them lined up to get off.

the road seemed familiar. guessing it was near hang tuah, i asked the chinese girl, "where is this?" she told me times square. i said "oh". she smiled and said bye and went off.

the bus door closed.

i stared at the road ahead. the bus was still stuck at the traffic light. i knew times square is near hang tuah but i couldnt see the train station. i called out for the bus driver "encik? encik! encik?!"

he ignored. the bus is still not moving.

i moved closer "ENCIK, HANG TUAH PERGI KIRI YA?" he said "bukanlah! hang tuah pergi depan terus." i sat back down. i squinted and tried to read the signboard in front. i became more confident that the bus driver was lying.

thank god i trusted road signs more than that fucking bastard!

i stood up with my bags. "encik, i nak turun". "ALA, TADI PANGGIL TURUN TAK TURUN!" he hesitated before pushing the button to open the door although the bus was still stuck at the traffic light.

i flipped him the finger and said FUCK OFF YOU FAT BITCH.

okay fine. i didnt. i got off and walked along the path and turned left. the station's about 100 metres away. i cursed the bus driver for lying. and being racist and rude.

before i went up the station, i looked back.

the bus wasnt even on that road yet. still stuck at the traffic light. fucking fucked up racist bus driver. i hope some crazy fucked up racist chinese or indian castrates him. and hang it at his door.

i headed home.

for a moment scenery pictures arent so special anymore because they're so common.

surprise from langkawi.

some time ago my sister went to langkawi. she sent me a text message asking me what i wanted. tell me. what do you think of when you hear the name langkawi? chocolates? liquor? cigarettes? "aiya, bring back sand lah." i joked.

honestly, i couldnt think of anything more special.

that's the second time she went to langkawi in the duration of a month. so there's enough chocolate at home to kill all the dogs in kota kemuning. which reminds me. i still have about 200g of m&m's in my room from the first trip.

"hi mojo! i'm back! see what i got you!"

she dumped the bag of goodies on the floor and left to her room. she locked the door. silence. i took out the items one by one. mars bars, kisses, hugs, m&m's, more mars bars, and then i saw something.

okay. male readers probably wont get this.

it's something wrapped in newspaper. and it's in a plastic bag. to prevent leakage or something. surprise from malacca! disturbed, i held it up with two fingers and flung it to my sisters door.

it obediently rammed into the door and landed on the floor.

my sister opened the door. assuming i banged on the door, she stared at me. pointing at that thing, i asked, "what's that!" she looked at the ground and picked it up.

"your sand lah!"