dont call me freshie.

for whatever reason, mmu have this annoying tradition of calling their freshmen "freshie". frankly speaking, it sounds like some sort of fruit juice, don't you think? freshie orange juice.

it's been 2 months and 23 days.

here's to how's mmu. it's ironic how the students representative council (src) asked for freshies' opinions after the orientation. opinion on the orientation i can understand.

but opinion on mmu's facilities?

if you ask a senior i bet he can list down like 172453452709 things he's unsatisfied with mmu. what with bloody lifts and crazy air-cons and hidden recycling bins and the smelly stretch along FSER.

next. orientation.

honestly, i can't remember much about orientation. i reckon the freshies did not enjoy it as much as the orientation commitee did. plus we were strangers. we barely had time to comment on it.

well, except for the food.

because it sucked it made us suffer diarrhea for one whole week and if we had nine lives we would have died again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again.

it was so delicious.

like joel once said, "there's no food like free food". anyway, after the orientation, most freshies basically lost contact with the orientation commitee. it was like a one week stand.

but then again :)

actually i only had everything up there in my mind. other than that, i currently want a softtoy with the name shampoo. dq seemed reluctant. let's show dq i don't need him hmph *hint hint*.

one day i'll abduct a penguin from the zoo.

in conjunction with the prince and princess night organised by mmu melaka, the law students from PL03 decided to hold a beauty pageant entitled the beauty pageant.

random guy on the street, shampoo, interviews joanne.

shampoo: hello there. i heard you're the organizer of this event. how does it go?

joanne: well, every girl is a candidate because we feel that every girl is special and beautiful. every guy have to rate every girl out of 10.

shampoo: wow, that must be pretty tiring. what makes up the total score of 10?

joanne: 1 for brains, 1 for personality, 1 for face, 7 for body.

shampoo: i see. who do you think will win?

joanne: well, initially i thought this brainy and pretty girl would win but 10 points have been deducted because she has a boyfriend, so her current score is negative.

shampoo: oh. what's the prize anyway? i heard it's a date with naufal.

joanne: *laughs* yes, but the girl has to pay everything. either that or she gets an offer to join the reality show i wanna be a model. it's like america's next top model.

shampoo: so i've heard. malaysians. always plagiarising. *sigh* next thing you know they'll come out with pudu jail escape or something.

* * *

purely fictional. girl gets bored when doing laundry. *grumbles*.

this is my sister jessica loke.

she spends her time sms-ing me.

when i take a picture with her

she's expressionless.

when i bite her

she giggles and chuckles.

when i lick her

she laughs and says "again! again!"

hungry :(

edit: i have always wanted to say this. every august, you will see all the proud faces on the newspapars with their jalur gemilangs made out of tin cans or handprints or whatever-they-can-find. it's ironic how they're so proud to show off that we're only patriotic once every year.

i'm a patriot. rawr.

joanne and kia vin.

kwanyi and joanne.

amirul, mahen and mark.

putrajaya, johor bharu, tawau.

joanne and david.

naufal and joanne.

mahen and joanne.

behold: evolution.

effortless effort - stolen.

first try - irrelevant.

second try - simple and irrelevant.

third try - complicated and irrelevant.

fourth try - simple and relevant.

fifth try - professionally relevant.

sixth try - my masterpiece.

this is what law students crack their heads doing. i love computer applications :)

dear mum,

it's unnecessary for you to read this, but if you insist:

you must be worried whether i'm mixing with the right group of people. truth be told mum, my friends are all very nice people and i usually eat and sleep with my housemates. the other day i had lunch with 3 of my classmates. they categorized my class into several cliques:

1 the studying chinese girls

2 the hot chinese chicks

3 the studying chinese boys

4 the shad gang

5 the mahen gang

6 kanak-kanak riang

7 biskut (now you see them, now you don't)

8 the models

9 the ones who condemn the models

10 the models wannabe

and then there's number 11.

11. naufal

it's kinda funny because i happen to think naufal is a very cool guy. i usually hang out with number 5. we are a very multiracial gang with 2 chinese, 2 malay, 2 indian and a kadazan girl. here are some my friends, mum. i shall upload the rest of them soon.

attack of the lalas.

Secret

this is the must watch movie of the year! miss it and you'll regret for the rest of your lives i'm serious. i dare say it'll be nominated for various awards :D

i'm not just saying this because i'm a hardcore jay chou fan.

i couldn't sleep the night before and after i watch the movie. imagine how good it is. sleepless nights, everyone loves it. it was on my mind even the morning after i watch it, you HAVE to watch it.

you MUST, you NEED TO!!

if you're busy, watch it anyway; if you don't like jay chou, watch it anyway; if you don't understand chinese, WATCH IT ANYWAY! it's definitely effin better than a walk to remember!

EFF i don't know how to sound anymore convincing.

i swear it's a good show. i would buy everyone i know movie tickets for the show if i were rich. if you miss the show i have the file but it sucks so wait till i buy the dvd one day okay?

i'll watch and cry with you if you want.

if you don't watch it you're inhuman. if you don't cry when you watch it you're inhuman. if you don't admire jay chou after the movie, you're INHUMAN! please, please, please watch it! you'll come thank me later.

i'm so proud of jay chou! :)))

ATTENTION:

sorry this post is down here although it comes after the "Secret" (the must watch movie) post. this is because as a fan, i feel obliged to promote jay chou's first movie.

(which is wonderful fantastic amazing etc).

ANYWAY

in case you didn't realize, i have linked 2 new bloggers. Cindy and Shad. besides that, dq have started updating his blog again. his blog concept is interesting. go have a look. the first post is about jay chou!!

so dai sek :p

i finally found my long lost kindy friend after 11 years.

Joanne says:
hi!

LeongWengSeng says:
hi hi

Joanne says:
i'm joanne, but i dont think you remember

Joanne says:
um, i sent you a comment on friendster though

LeongWengSeng says:
which joanne?

Joanne says:
well, i'm not sure if i found the right person but..

LeongWengSeng says:
y??

Joanne says:
which kindergarten were you from?

LeongWengSeng says:
ohh

LeongWengSeng says:
i remember which joanne are u

Joanne says:
hahaha really? tha'ts great!

LeongWengSeng says:
the girl from friendster

Joanne says:
yes! so so so which kindy you from?

LeongWengSeng says:
eden

Joanne says:
yay!

LeongWengSeng says:
haha

Joanne says:
hahahaha seriiiiously!

LeongWengSeng says:
i remember tat u very very small last time, i see ur pic in friendster now so big liao hahah

Joanne says:
yes!!! i've been looking for you so long, well not really looking and i dont know why but it's the satisfaction of finding you. you is smsj?

LeongWengSeng says:
yup

Joanne says:
how are you? it's like ... more than 10 years since i last saw you you still look the same

LeongWengSeng says:
i really look the same??????

Joanne says:
yes! cuter last time hahahhaha

LeongWengSeng says:
where got? last time i so cute, now lots of pimple

Joanne says:
i bet when you're like 23 graduate no more pimple anymore aha not schooling today?

LeongWengSeng says:
nope where are u?

Joanne says:
i'm in melaka

LeongWengSeng says:
ahhh, i see i see

Joanne says:
i skipped standard 4 so i'm in uni nowXD

LeongWengSeng says:
loL..

Joanne says:
yeah

LeongWengSeng says:
kena NS not?

Joanne says:
i dont think so, i checked few times dont have, i go check again. how bout u?

LeongWengSeng says:
got it

etc. :)

okay. i have some stuff to clarify:

my last post was about slim girls who say their fat. fat referring to tummy and thighs. not chubby girls. somehow i got carried away near the end. slim girls like me. i'm slim :)))

no wait, i'm porky. :/

i'm thin but sometimes i feel my tummy and say i'm fat before i can stop myself. some people don't say it because they don't have it. it's like i have time so i say i've got time.

you don't and you don't say so.

oh and since an apology won't work, my weight is specifically 42.5kg if it makes you feel any better :) oh and i've also been commented as thin all my life. it doesn't annoy me. i was also always referred to as flat back in form 1, 2, 3.

tetek kemek wtf.

you don't see it because i don't wear a size 2 when i'm a size 10 (analogy here). i may look fine because i don't wear a size 24 (i'll probably suffocate and die). seriously, i wear a size 26 even though it's abit loose. all i have to do is grow into it :D

no one shows off what they dislike about themselves.

i feel fine most of the time except when i eat too much and end up gasping for air. i'm thin. i know i'm thin. i'm glad i'm the way i am. you can say i'm thin all you want it doesn't bother me. and i don't say i'm fat to anyone else except you. aren't you proud i trust you so :)) sorry for being insensitive anyway. slipped my mind.

slim girls have issues.

i'm hungry. sensitive issue ahead.

i'm gonna disagree with kwanyi's post about girls calling themselves fat. maybe, just maybe, i'd qualify a little more to say abit on this :P

i've been thin all my life.

that's a general statement. like saying malaysian drivers suck. most of us suck but some don't. i don't deny i'm overall "thin", but unfortunately a little chubby at all the wrong places.

anyway, it's not so much of an issue for me.

oh wait, it is. boo hoo, life sucks. i agree that it's annoying when slim girls, who are... slim, say they're fat. feels like you wanna shove their heads down the loo and flush 10 times etc.

they're drama queens or aneroxic or bulimic.

strike out those people from society and we have normal girls who:
! eat normal and are fine with their weight
2 eat normal and are not fine with their weight.
3 eat abnormal and complain about being fat.
4. go on diet and keep fit.
5. go on diet for real but complain.
5. go on diet for fake and complain.

when a girl says she is fat (and slim people example kwanyi won't experience this shit) they're probably referring to a flabby pair of arms or thighs, or a tummy consisting 2 or 3 spare tires.

or more (feel the horror).

i sympathize them. how sad. imagine not being able to wear skinny pants or short pants like the other girls showing off their legs or just pants fearing your tummy might be protruding if the pants is just a little too small. imagine having a picture perfect smile in a perfect picture only to find that your arms takes up 1/3 of the picture.

that's why they say their fat.

to the naked eye, they seem like any other girl. a chubby girl might even seem more attractive, they have cellulites at the right places! it's just that sometimes, they're a little "fat".

if everybody gotta wait till they're this fat to say their fat:

THE WORLD IS DOOMED!!

(a thousand apologies to the happy couple above who look happy but probably not that happy inside or maybe they're just happy or maybe it's photoshop wtf whatev i take back my apology)

i have finally completed my montage! it's mostly about me. i'm self-centered. so what? i spent my holiday thinking about my montage and my debate. tough mental work.

saturday: oh ya, the montage.

sunday: uh-oh, not yet start the montage.

monday: must start montage.

tuesday: no powerpoint. die.

wednesday: dad say he'll bring back software.

thursday: uh-oh, dad brought back windows os.

friday: tomorrow go back, i'll figure.

saturday: library closed. cc closed for smm dota, housemates not back.

sunday: cc don't have powerpoint, citan cc.

credits to my housemate evan who let me use her desktop for a whole day. at 518pm yesterday jess sms-ed me: "haha.i installed microsoft office yesterday already.haha.you suck."

to lah or not to lah

toothpastefordinner.com

dear lovelies,

when i say who else would message you i don't care if the whole world doesn't i will even if i were the only one i will (please use digi).

when i say you're getting fat or getting bald (and you're probably not) even if you really are getting fat and bald and decaying and disintegrating (i hope not) i love you just the way you are.

when i say you're gonna miss me and i claim i'm pretty cool and super and i tell you at least you get to see me and i tell you at least you still have me, it's true. you're so goddamn lucky.

*laughs*

even though i call you an idiot or a dumbass
even though i push you
even though i hit you
even though i say i hate you when i cant decide between hercules and freetime
even though i say i hate you when i cant locate my things
even though i say i hate you when i see aties aties everywhere

the truth is i love you all to death.

i don't want to go back to melaka but i want to go back to melaka i miss melaka and i want to stay and i want to force you to spend me popcorn at the movies but i'm going back.

i'm going back today.

and even though i sound sappy and cheesy and corny i'm still going to attempt to annoy you when i come back because i love you and you and you and you and you and you.

love me back or die.

toothpastefordinner.com

i'm currently reading this book a million little pieces by james frey. a memoir of a guy sent to rehab by his family for alcohol and drug abuse and being arrested around 13 times.

how ironic.

imagine being arrested 13 times and being sent to rehab by your family instead of some authority. anyway, it's much more interesting than wuthering heights. i just don't dig classics.

(sorry emily brontë)

i read a few pages of that book and gave up. i admit. my brain functions better with simple words and phrases. lah for instances, makes me feel like home :)

eat drugs lah, drink alcohol lah, die lah.

i was totally determined to finish the book today until my classmate reminded about my parliamentary debate next tuesday. DIE, DIE, DIE! i havent done a thing yet.

*laughs hysterically*

i'm opposing the idea that rapist should go to jail for life. ladies and gentlemen, i would like to carry out a simple survey. how many of you randomly feel horny regularly?

joanne, defender of the rapists.

why dont i feel it.

dear young malaysians (15-25 years old): what does merdeka mean to you and how has growing up in this country moulded you? submit your entries today!

email to: youth2@thestar.com.my

did i mention i'm a hardcore fan of this dq guy? did i mention i have this habit of buying candy for people i like? did i mention i always buy people things i like? rocky lollipop and m&m's :)

aren't you jealous wwink.

when i come home, i usually hang out with these few people: da qiang, joshua, kia vin, kwan yi, lester and ryan. i realize the guys here possess this ONE similiarity:

kai, the king of mop

lesles, the king of all seas.

dq, the king of petrol refilling.

and although not ALL the guys pose the same:

they're still unique in their own ways.

ryan, the king of gamblers

this next one for example is never alone.

josh, the king of i-make-ryan-look-constipated

josh, the king that shines.

I'M HOME!!!

for a WHOLE WEEK. let's see, what does this imply?

no more ixora

no more annoying guards

(i know you cant see him)

no more "haunted" lifts

no more annoying beeping machines

(which are actually pretty cool :P)

no more ixora food court food

AND LASTLY,

no more laundry.

"wow this is fun!"

two more days!

to do list:
1. montage
2. kindergarten
3. dating
4. eat nice food
5. bath with warm water

sometimes, when people joke, they like to add lines like, "my father used to say", "george bush once said", "like the old saying" etc. law students on the other hand will add lines like:

"according to article..."

(usually they will end at "article" because they don't know how to continue etc) so i bought you a jar filled with chocolates to make you smile like you smiled the other day :)

remember back in form 5 i used to post entries on popularity being superficial?

it's inevitable to get bugged by issues like this in secondary school but when you get to university, the popularity concept does not exist.

i can say you can't be popular.

not that you can't. maybe you can. but not to the extent the thousands of students in university will know you. well, unless you're the waiter in dean's cafe or you stabbed your friend etc.

i'm in uni before qiang :P