kia vin TOUCHED my boyfriend!!!!!!! :/

mungkin nanti reminds me of form 5 :]

i know that, many of us have move on in college, and like many other chapters in life, you hear people telling you, these will be the best 4 years of your life etc.

moving on from high school, who doesn't miss high school? they say it's hell in uni, it's hectic in college, like it was paradise in high school.

we worry so much about youngsters, about teenagers, and how they're doing in high school, unplanned birth and drug abuse, smoking and gangsterism.

what would high school be if everyone were goodie two shoes? imagined if everyone were the average conventional nerdy boy and girl next door.

no puppy love in school, no social hierachies, everyone wore high stockings, pulled their pants up, have ribbons in their hair, have mary poppin's big flary skirts, and do not break school rules.

no one ran around, the school was quiet and the students all scored A's. would that be really a society dream? i beg to differ. if high school were like that it wouldn't be high school.

i changed hell lot, been through what i should as a teenager and those are the times i wish to forget, those are the times i learn to be a better person, moving on from naive.

i do daydream, i was going to tell my daughter what to do, what not to, to be the perfect student. it doesn't work that way, to learn, you have to make mistakes. you don't get up unless you fall.

what is courage? is it brave? we're like a bunch of small kids going to college, but for all it's worth, we've moved on from that growing phase.

make your next 4 years the best years of your life, live up to your expectatoins, do not regret, and take chances, because this life is too short for disappointments. :]

i love da qiang :]

recently some mrs. loke wrote to StarEducation demanding an explanation as to why is it compulsory for chinese school girls to maintain their hair above their collars.

just to be clear, i believe that several chinese schools have abolished the rule. example, my niece's. but if you're saying you're depriving small girls of their femininity, hell that's a crime!

no, i'm on the fence here. personally, i'm not agitated by the sight of a sea of mushroom heads. similiarly, i don't comprehend how can haircuts improve the study environment.

is it that much of a controversial issue? no i don't really bother, i'm just killing time here. but seroiusly, short hair saves time and keeps your hair healthy.

sure enough, kids may not know how to style their hair like high school punks, you can enforce the whole take care of your hair thing or i'll chop a bundle off.

enough said.

ongoing romance with the computer sounds pretty appealing, because true enough, it is an unanimated object which is very much non-jugmental and accepts me for who i am.

unfortunately, it's love without lust.

that applies becuase i believe you can't do the computer. obviously. i mean why would anyone do the computer? dig a hole in the cpu? thereafter die of electric shock.

don't die also no father's day.

yesh, i'm obnoxious. violent, rude, cocky, think-they-are-cool guys who hai here hai there is a huge turn off. yesh, i realize the versatility of hai.

i guess i'll just stick to solitaire. heavenly game.

i think i'll go shopping soon. i predict i'll feel depressingly bumped out. do not try to reach me via handphone, house phone, msn, e-mail, snail mail etc.

i have a constant urge to teleport to dq.

i figure, since the globe does spin quite fast, there should be something stationary up in the sky, then i cant sit there and wait for the globe to move and then decent from the heavens.

provided the earth don't move too fast and i don't get shot down by the US air forces. and anyway the earth does spin only one way, not like i can choose my destination.

damn, i hate reality. there goes my great invention.

giberrish is pronouced gee. pilates is pronouced pee-la-tees. how dumb is that. it looks like pirates, so i pronounced it pai-letts.

little did i know not only human looks decieve.

i just recieved a good news. kiavin's mum said dq and i secocok. that goes to prove that we will last forever. none of us will die drinking poison or sink in the atlantic ocean.

shakespeare will write for us in heaven.

or hell. they say in the bible women for men. so god knows where he went. and who said he's gay anyway, people assume. maybe he reincarnated into michael jackson.

then 2100 sonnets decend from heaven.

then your great grandchildren will study about us. and when they read the sonnets, our love will revive again. damn scary la, die already still want to revive. like vampire.

kiavin said if i 5A's he chop.

i hope he's saying chop that part he uses to reproduce. dq said i'm not aloud to talk about aeroplanes so i shall not talk about it. why call aeroplane? can fly meh?

spm results coming out.

i decided if i get 5A's and below i shall eat my cert and die of choking on the spot. if i don't choke i'll drown myself at the sink. don't try stop me or i'll turn on the next tap and shove your head in.

we go to heaven together.

there are approximately 6.5 billion people in the world. stephen hawking said it's inevitable, the human race will colonize mars sooner or later.

or maybe we can all die and live in heaven.

i refuse to believe that i'm anywere near miss congeniality. thanks for the nomination anyway. there are people who dislike me who comes to my blog for no apparent reason.

and then they say things at the tagboard which i don't bother to delete.

life is beautiful. i shouldn't sound so negative. besides, i have a family, my organs are alright, i have had will have love and lust, i won't get 5A's and i have solitaire in my computer.

mind of a genius, you cynical, sadistic, genius.

i reazlised kwanyi have nice cheek bones. i don't. my face is like oval. i have cheeks when i smile but i'm depressingly oval.

abby got nice natural silky hair. rawr.

daqiang have nice jaw bones. under the ear to the chin. i don't. it's not that i'm too fat (maybe i am, i happen to have a double chin) i just don't have a prominent one. rawr.

envy, envy.

i hope results out asap. i'm anxious. if it's a freaking 5A's then shove it in my face right away! rawr. i won't get 5A's la. don't be stupid.

i went to bai nian today!!

kiavin waited for me and kwanyi at the bus stop opposite summit. so sweet right? then he picked abby and joshua up and we head to lester's place to meet up with amry!

abby

kwanyi shy shy.

amry.

kiavin and i.

kiavin HAD to have his socks on my blog.

josh looking british, lester very ang ang.

then, we headed to dq's place where we found him munching on lunch. kishok arrived just in the nick of time! the adventures of the angpau-obsessed gang!! hoho.

i love love love his shirt.

we head to the mamak after that because dq didn't give us anything to eat. rawr.

mamak got plasma tv. so advance.

guess who's hand 1?

guess who's hand 2 ?

100% gujerati.

no idea what lester's hand doing in the pic.

abby's behind kwanyi fyi.

lester and dq captivated by bollywood semi-porn

kiavin's hair.

threesome.

shoes!

after mamak, we went to kiavin's place. kiavin was so excited he spilt his vanila coke on the floor. so joshua, being the gentleman that he was, brought a tiny orange bucket as seen below.

not only a tiny bucket, but one without water!!

kiavin did it anyway, the King of Mop.

after that, we stopped by dq's house to collect angpau because his dad was out previously, then we head to abby's and then amry's. didn't take anymore pictures.

cinta, the sequel.

apa itu cinta?

okay. guess who is this. if you don't know, you should go and you should go and you should go and you should go and aiya i don't know you la. you better know. rawr.

Tak Nak.

安定的日子不一定就是幸福

referring to this (click here) post, you might be thinking, who the hell is alexander kam? if you googled him (which i did) you'll find some baseball player.

but NO, i ain't talking bout no baseball player, i'm talking about a 5-year-old boy from my workplace. alexander kam. kam yoong wei or kam yong wei. aiya, who cares.

alexander acting cute.

not that i want alexander as my boyfriend, pfft. don't be silly la okay? i love da qiang ONLY okay. i very setia wan. rawr.

alexander gave me a hug - qiang, you never hug me so long jor :( - before he went back home. i had a chance to talk to him a little. these are details i korek-ed so far:

Family.

1. dad - marcus
2. mum - silvia
3. siblings - kevin, jason, sister (didn't tell me name)

Staff.

1. maids: auntie sth, auntie sth, auntie sth, auntie sth and auntie sth who went back already
2. drivers: uncle sth, uncle sth, uncle sth and uncle sufi.

Cars:

1. sth 333: very big, white colour.
2. sth 333: very big, black with tinted windows.
3. sth 3: black, looks like a merc
4. sth 6238: honda city, gold.

he only registered 4 cars with the school, means his dad's working car plus his mum's sports car etc not taken in account yet. hoho. his mum obviously goes for tanning.

i mean she's like BROWN wei. as in GOLDEN BROWN. roasted brown! like kenny rogers chicken. i predict she goes to the gym quite often. muscle woman man, don't play play.

alexander wears red baby crocs. the disney crocs whatev. as in the genuine nice one, not the 10 bucks cheap skate brand. really mickey mouse shape one okay. 100% TULEN.

sesat picture. sarah and i. pictures coutesy of kwanyi.

alexander passed me his homework paper before he went off to play simon says. he almost won but he lost anyway. he didn't ask for the paper back, see he's hinting me something. hoho.

i made a vow not to talk about him anymore (this is my last time) because i'm UBER confirmed that my colleagues (esp kwanyi - perempuan yg berbaloi disimpatikan) are annoyed by my obsession.

besides, i love dq!!! dqdqdqdqdqdqdqdqdqdqdq!! RAWR!!

[ dq> alexander ] okay.

dq= love!

yes la i'm pathetic.

STREET TALK.



joel: complaining being alone on valentine is pathetic. im alone in giant ok.



joanne: spending valentine's day alone when you have someone to spend it with is like :(



kwanyi: valentine's day is over-rated. celebrate each day like its valentines. you dont need a reason to give and love. everyday is a gift, thats why they call it the present. endure it like there's no tomorrow because life is ours to lead.



valentine's day!!



nope, i didn't spend vday with da qiang. mum thinks facial dai go tin (facial bigger than sky) and she had to do it today. i wanted to mogok lapar and wear dq's shirt to protest. rawr. >

then jess came home with this!

101 fresh roses from yeoh da qiang :D i reserve my bragging rights. i admit, i've never received roses before unless you take in consideration that few stolen roses given to me during mpt5.

i never had a valentine :/

back in form4, i had a major crush on dq, i HAD to give him something and wish him! i distributed a whole bunch of lollies so it wouldn't seem obvious, i kept lemon flavour for dq!

and i gave him green apple lolly form 5. ngee :)

sadly, i didn't give anything to dq this year. i was gonna appear at his door, ding dong, put a ribbon on my head, tada! happy valentine's day! you may unwrap your present now!

it didn't happen because mummy's a meanie :(

the roses are so pretty!! they're prettier now becuase the roses have bloomed but i was too pathetically insane and obsessed over my roses that the camera battery ran out too soon.

thank you pumpkin, wo ai ni!!

very mild form of pda from yours truly. :P

the poo toll has increased to a grand total of 7!

with aaron leading the herd with a whooping 3 times! ian twice, wei eainn once as well as angeline (who isn't even in my class but she was absent the next day due to "stomach upset")

and it's vday so i had double trouble today.

plus, they had to do it the same time, thus i had to run back and fourth both toilets to see who's ass is ready to be wiped. gee. i'm so proud of my job. they'll drop on their knees and thank me later in life.

after kindergarten ended, i was with howard, who technically is my boyfriend after i bribed him.

jo: howard, you haven't wish me.

howard: mmhmm.

jo: howard, wish me.

howard: mmm.

jo: howard, follow me k? happy,

howard: happy,

jo: valentine's,

howard: valentine's

jo: day.

howard: day.

jo: thank you howard!! so sweet of you!!

howard: =)

jo: howard, are you still my boyfriend?

howard: *nods head*

jo: howard, you didnt give me present, i thought you're my boyfriend.

howard: *smiles*

jo: howard, i give you my eraser, then you give back to me and wish me k?

:(

things you didnt know.

1. i had my hair cut and straightened for RM40.

2. i use pantene pro-v. sunsilk is kinda dry. rejoice is not bad, but not as smooth as dove. wella smells like dq.

3. i don't shampoo my hair everyday.

4. i bath when i wake up, before i go to bed to avoid zits.

5. i hate clean&clear.

6. shokobutsu dettol smells good.

7. i wash my feet everytime after using the toilet if it's wet. yes, i'm very weird.

8. for exercise, i jog round the park and do pilates.

9. i drink alot of water hoping for a better complexion.

10. my best advice ever: leave your hands off your face, whether it's a pimple, whitehead or blackhead, DO NOT TOUCH.

do not try to live forever. you will not succeed. have a nice day.
-quote by kwanyi.

when dq's happy, i'm happy,
when dq's sad, i'm sad,
when dq's moody, i'm moody,
when dq's angry, i'm upset,
when dq's horny, dq's a guy.

when dq's irritated,
when dq's angry,
he doesn't show it,
he keeps everything inside,
and he thinks no one knows.

*grumbles*

this is dq,
he is half a banana,
this is jo,
she is not a banana at all.

when dq listens to david tao,
jo listens to jay chou,
when dq watches wah lai toi,
jo watches star world.

when i saw dq dota,
i wanted to try also,
so i dived in, tried to impress,
i got kicked by dq and friends.

when i saw dq cs in cc,
i wanted to try also,
i headshot my own team mate,
and never cs sinced.

what would dq pick?
football vs dota
politics vs geography
david tao vs me

*grumbles*

i love you. rawr.

random 10.

1. valentine's day is just a way to make people feel worse about not having someone to share it with.

2. the truth about most businesses and tradings.

3. frankly speaking, i doubt the story of my life will inspire anyone anytime soon, unless for some reason, they needed inspiration to be boring.

4. working is like sitting for exams. it's not very much about making a difference with outstanding progress, it's more about satisfying your boss, like fulfilling marking schemes.

5. and you're thinking what's wrong with the human race not doing great things. we're constantly confined. like children, they can be prodigies, geniuses, but we limit everything.

6. what is love?

7. the need to emphasize gender equality is not a question. it's a crucial action.

8. guys will be guys will be horny guys.

9. people are selfish, we think, why conserve water when other people don't and we will end up the same way? why suffer when they don't?





10. if by any chance, i die of excessive heat, please do not cremate me.

reasons people go to the gym:
1. work out and keep fit.
2. don't wanna waste membership fee.
3. wanna irritate people by using the treadmill for a long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long time.

i'm not a big fan of gyms. and overly-muscular men frightens me. i went to the gym anyway because i wanted to run abit, sit up abit, and then exercise my fragile little arms.

it didn't go so well because the gym was literally jam-packed on sunday, thus, i didn't get to even TOUCH the treadmill. i did not appreciate whatsoever that bloody short-lived session.

gym manager dude: how old are you
joanne: errr.. 17.
gym manager dude: you sure?
joanne: yup.




i'm in desperate need to keep fit. now don't you hear that often? unforetunately i do fall in that category of desperate people who talk about how desperate they are to exercise but never ever get down to doing it.

thus we go on being desperate for about oh let's say the rest of our pathetic lives spending less than 1% of our lives "keeping fit". jess predicted i wouldn't get into heaven. that guy in white robe with wings would tell me i don't qualify because i spent one third of my life bathing.

it's just to keep me clean so i wouldnt stink up heaven :(

considering how petite (thin, skinny, bony, flat, whatever makes you happy) i am, i am in the need to exercise. oh yesh, i do have cellulites, just that they exist at the wrong parts of the body.

like lijen say, why don't they go up there?

i'm not suggesting you to have a boob of adipose tissues omg, but i hate the fact that i eat and eat and i don't grow fatter, neither do i shoot up. the days of worms in my intestines were long gone, so what the hell is my problem?

and so i decided i need to exercise anyway, the gym isn't necessary for my age. i decided to run around the park, do some pilates and if i'm desperate enough (not likely) i might use 1.5l water to replace dumbells. hoho.

kwanyi proudly claimed that she shares the same birthday with 31 years old "Angelina Jolie - mother of 3, wife to the hottest man on earth, UN Goodwill Ambassador, talented actress, sex symbol. "

June 4th- kwanyi's bday!!
-Angelina Jolie

although i disagree with the "hottest man on earth statement" (brad pitt always seemed like a whatever-you-call-a-male-bimbo to me), i was excited to see who's birthday clashes with who's!!

http://www.famousbirthdays.com/

August 16th- Alexander's bday!!
-Madonna
-Vanessa Carlton

like, OMG, NO WONDER ALEXANDER IS SO, FREAKING, HAWT!! like, sizzling hawt (yesh, i know i'm sick, i brought him to toilet today and push the door to peek) and like, HOW HAWT IS HE?

TSSSSSssss.

September 4th- (my pumpkin) dq's birthday!!
-beyonce

as in that big golden hair woman in ace ventura with a big mumma voice. yesh, you heard me. great. you guys share same birthdays with hot people.

how about me?

although i strongly believe your birthday do not determine your destiny, prosperity, wealth, health, fertility, how good you are in bed, etc, etc, why you all get hawt hawt people wan?

what about me? WHAT ABOUT ME?

December 3rd- MY birthday!!
-holly marie combs
-ozzy osbourne

okay, fine. holly marie combs is KIND OF hot. one of the "charmed ones". as you can see, i victoriously found a picture where the other "charmed ones" are cut off.


plus, they have her name on their boobs. wow.




but of all people, ozzy osbourne. the left guy on top strangling marilyn manson, that goth who married his Burlesque stripper girlfriend in a black black wedding.


tak ong la!!!


and omg, marry a stripper. darling honey sweetie lou kong, i give you free service everyday, lemme show you what many other men have seen.


*whips marilyn manson's ass*


ozzy osbourne's a rock star, front man of Black Sabbath, sold over 27million albums, so yeah, he's pretty darn great. and kwanyi told me he's a rock legend who ate a rat performing on stage.

fear factor meh...


but why? WHY? of all the hot people in the world (i'm sorry jay and edison, not that i don't want, cupid can be so unfair to us, i know, don't fight for me), why must i get this crazy bitch dude?

rat..................yum................

the three.

the macho.

the lala.

the jeng.

as much as i tend to use the word "lah" , we all know it's NOT a word. i estimated my maximum usage of "lah" - about 200 times a day. that qualifies me as an average 16 years old malaysian.

thank you, thank you, no need to clap.

i guess, considering we do live in a boleh country, we malaysians decided that "lah" is equally good as any other word in the dictionary.

"lah" is essential to you, to me, to us.

the lovely thing about "lah" is, it adds a lot of character to your sentence. you don't really need a perfect sentece to express what you're feeling. so does" horr", "meh", "wan" etc.

i can't!
-i cannot wan laaaaaaaaah!!

funny isn't it?
-very the funny horr??

you bought?!
-you got buy meh?!

malay, chinese, indian. we speak malay, mandarin/ cantonese/ hokkien/ teochew/ hakka/ hainan/ etc etc china damn big, and tamil/ hindu.

technically, none of us spoke english.

but what brings us together is english. modified into manglish. therefore, you can't deny that manglish is indeed extremely crucial in maintaining the country's harmony and unity.

so say your "lah"s today!

sunshine and love be with you,
in rainy days i shall be with you,
love is no fool,
dreams come true :]

i love dq :]